Tag Archives: personal development

Do you lead your life?

Most people don’t lead their life, they accept their life. Most people don’t challenge their thinking. They don’t question the way things are. They don’t reexamine their thought processes.  They don’t ask why they think a certain way. Instead, they accept the answers given. They are okay with no progression no evolvement.

Don’t be most people.

Question yourself. Question others. Inspire curiosity. Don’t accept ‘no’ to your ‘yes’. Don’t tell God your plans ask Him. Then listen. Always seek forward movement and reflection. Constantly ask yourself, why. The answers should inspire more questions and the questions should inspire action.

Go ahead. I dare you. Ask yourself, why.

xoxo,

Blonde Chick

post inspired by A More Beautifull Question by Warren Berger.

 

 

5 Ways to Thrive in the NICU [or any challenging environment]

Today marks the tenth day of little Lennon’s arrival. Although being in the NICU is not ideal, it’s been a great opportunity for personal and spiritual growth. There are a few things I’ve picked up on over the past week and a half on how to not just survive this experience but to thrive. If you’ve been in a situation like mine or one similar, what things have you learned to help along the way?

1. Positivity breeds positivity

When dealing with a seemingly negative situation count your blessings. It’s amazing what a positive attitude can do for you, your baby, and those around you. Austin and I won’t allow negativity into the room. So when we’ve been tired and start to get cranky with one another, we pause and focus back on having a positive conversation. We even change the tone of our voice! We want Lennon to be surrounded by positivity. When I was pregnant, I wouldn’t even allow myself to listen to negative music. So when music came on full of strippers and hoes or angst or anger, I changed the station. Even now, I focus on putting good in so that my output is good. 🙂 It’s amazing what our subconscious picks up.

2. Keep deodorant with you

In all seriousness, the NICU is warm. Plus every day I’m carting in my tote bag, our meals for the day, my massive Law book and more! So by the time I get up to see her, I’m already a bit hot! Then after my skin-to-skin care with her, I have to peel myself off the leather chair. It may not be cute, but the sweat is real! I’ve also read that after giving birth, you tend to sweat a  bit more as your body regains balance and eliminates extra fluids. Keep it fresh. Your baby and nurses will thank you.

Another quick tidbit is if you wear contacts be sure to pack some solution. If given the opportunity for a quick nap, you’ll need to refresh your eyes.

3. Be nice

You would be surprised at how rude people can be – well maybe not. In every interaction, we try to focus on being kind to those around us. People around here are under a lot of stress and emotion. It’s easy to judge and be critical of behavior especially when you’re tired and dealing with your emotions. When I find myself slipping into ‘judgment zone’ I try to focus and silently pray that the Lord will bless that person. This sounds soo cheesy! However, it helps me regain focus on what’s important.

4. Go home

It’s hard to leave your baby, Period. It’s important for her health and mine that we go home to recharge and rest. It’s that simple. Go home when you can and be sure to take care of yourself and your relationship with your partner. When your home take care of your to-do’s for instance, make dinner the night before or throw in a load of laundry. Each day choose a small task to conquer. Doing so will help you to avoid building a mountain ‘to do’s’ and allow you to focus when with your baby.

5. Get dressed

It’s so easy to throw on sweats, put on no makeup, and make little effort to look presentable. I’ve found though that by getting up and dressed my mind is better focused and prepared for the day ahead. I’m not in mourning. I’m not depressed. So, why look that way? By getting dressed, I’m setting myself up for a successful day. Again, the power of attitude can make all the difference in how we deal with the daily opportunities.

xoxo,

Blonde Chick

Saying Sorry

I ended a career with a company due to many personal reasons. In the ending months of that business relationship, there were several frustrating things that happened. Unfortunately, I handled the situation emotionally and did not respond in the best way. Instead, I let my frustration control my actions. Lately, it had been weighing on my mind.  I decided to apologize for my behavior. I  wasn’t sure what I expected to happen. Actually, I contemplated blocking the response from my email so that I wouldn’t have to deal with the potential negative reaction.

I don’t like conflict, I hate drama, and I don’t like the idea of leaving a negative impression in someone’s mind. I decided to apologize for my behavior. I  wasn’t sure what I expected to happen. Actually, I contemplated blocking the response from my email so that I wouldn’t have to deal with the potential negative reaction.

I received a very gracious response.  A huge weight lifted off my shoulders. A weight I didn’t realize I had been carrying with me all these months. Saying sorry is powerful regardless of who is right and who is wrong. There’s freedom when you forgive yourself and those who may have harmed you. A freedom I didn’t realize I had kept locked away.

This was a powerful lesson for me. I was so concerned with my feelings and my pride. Instead of focusing on reacting the right way, I let my pride lead. Learning to say sorry is the right way to live. Period.

xoxo,

Blonde Chick

The Unspoken Pressure

Many of the things I’ve learned since coming to Law School have nothing to do with the judicial system. Yes, of course, I’ve learned a ton in that regard, but more importantly I’ve learned a lot about myself. It’s easy to succumb to unspoken pressure when you’re in an environment of people who are extremely intelligent, driven and opinionated.  By pressure, I mean the feeling of needing to compete, of seeking peer approval or of feeling like you have to pursue a certain path in order to be successful. (a.k.a pay back your student loans).

Recently, I was able to meet with an attorney for a ‘mock’ interview. It was a great opportunity to sharpen my skills while getting prepared for pursuing internships or experience. One of the things he said to me (I’m paraphrasing) was that you have to stay true to who you are and what you want to do. This is something I always thought I knew. Yet, after the pleasantries were exchanged and I shook his hand. I went to my car and cried. I cried thinking, “What have I done?” “Why am I here?” “Why have I made the choice to take on more student loan debt?” “Why am I in Law School?”

Doubt started to overwhelm me. I thought about going home and giving up for the day. After an internal monolog, I pulled it together and went to school. Resolving to not get caught up in the idea of what other people are doing, which is much easier said than done.

I’ve known for quite some time that I don’t want a conventional career. (For goodness sakes, I was a theater major). I refuse to create a life dedicated to another [wo]man’s dollar or another [wo]man’s dream. With that mentality often comes uncertainty, instability, and sacrifice. These words have never really scared me. On the contrary, these words excite me.

I went to Law School to gain the skills to catapult my love for serving others into helping turn their dreams of entrepreneurship, of entertainment, of artistry into realities. Ultimately, I want to advocate for, protect, and serve creative geniuses.

I’m excited to be on this journey. I’m grateful for the opportunity. Although there is much uncertainty, instability, and sacrifice involved I know I made the right choice. Others may think I’m crazy or wonder about me, but I’ll remain true to myself, my unique talents, and the dreams that God has given me.

xoxo,

BC

Millennial Talk

Why is there so much interest in the millennial generation? There’s so much discussion surrounding this generation because we are the ones in the workforce – and are coming in with force. So what makes us so different than previous generations? For one, we are comfortable with advancements in technology. We grew up with it. We are the first generation to have fully grown up technology literate, practically from birth.

This fundamental difference is one of the biggest and it impacts how we communicate. I think we can all agree that communication is key in the workplace and can be the thread that keeps you moving forward successfully. No matter the differences there are some common traits that all generations can relate to. Keeping these 5 commonalities in mind can be helpful when landing your first job and dealing with all different types of professionals from any generation.

  1. To work on challenging projects.
  2. To receive competitive compensation.
  3. To have opportunities for advancement and chances to learn and grow in their jobs.
  4. To be fairly treated.
  5. To maintain a work-life balance.

Let technology be a staple used for your success but make sure to communicate outside of that security.

Exhaustion. The New Measure of Success?

Professionals today are moving faster, tackling multiple responsibilities at once and constantly adding more to their already full plates. We have evolved into thinking that if we are exhausted then we are accomplished. What does exhaustion do? It causes us to burn out, to become irritable more quickly and not lead as we should.

So how do we avoid the inevitable trap of adding more and more? How do we strive for success while maintaining balance? Here are four simple life hacks to keep you progressing without burning out.

1. Unplug one day a week.

Yes, put your phone down (turn it on airplane mode!) for at least 6 hours a week. I typically unplug on Saturday afternoons and don’t pick it back up till after breakfast on Sundays. This allows me to reconnect with the world outside my phone and computer. Try recharging while unplugging from technology.

2. Plan a vacation. Every year no matter what.

Travel gives you something to look forward to. It’s the light at the end of the tunnel, so on your hardest days you  have a light at the end of the tunnel. Many hard working professionals and small business owners find it difficult to go on vacation. The truth is, your business won’t stop moving without you and your career won’t fail if you’ve taken a week off. Getting away actually allows you to find clarity, and think with greater insights than just grinding out more work.

3. Consistency.

Ah, the power of consistency. If you are looking to lose weight what do you do? You stick to a good diet, and consistently exercise. This is the same principle in every endeavor. Looking to become an expert in a certain field? Start by committing to read a new book every month on the subject from experts. Want to be a writer? Start writing. Commit to a time and day and no matter what do it. Be consistent and even if seemingly slow going, the momentum you will gain overtime will astound you.

4. Prep.

It’s all in the details. Like many, you go from work or school to home just to find another set of responsibilities to take care of.  Pick one afternoon a week to prep for the week ahead. This prep means writing out your to-do lists, meal planning and even prepping for some of those meals. Even scheduling out time to take care of your personal business goes a long way. You wouldn’t miss a meeting with your boss or a client – so don’t miss a meeting with yourself. If you prep for the gym by bringing your workout clothes to work with you then you are preparing for success. It’s little pieces of preparation along the way that will add up to more time spent enjoying the fruits of your labor.

Try to pick one of these 4 hacks this week and see if you feel a bit more in control and recharged this week! Let me know how it goes.

x0x0

Blonde Chick